Tippler’s Dilemma: What Cocktail To Drink With King Cake?

King cake is an amazing thing.

For starters, it’s only served during Carnival, so in theory, you can only get it between Epiphany (January 6) and Fat Tuesday.* Limited availability makes anything special.

Also, it comes in a vast array of flavors. Some prefer the “traditional” king cake, which doesn’t usually have much flavor apart from the granulated sugar on top and maybe a little cinnamon mixed in the dough. I for one find that completely underwhelming: bring on the Bavarian cream or the apple and goat cheese, please.

However, king cake also presents a major dilemma: what the hell are you supposed to drink with it?

Vintage Tippler: A Swinging 60s Travel Bar

Need a birthday present for your favorite booze hound? Here’s a a fabulous vintage Tippler find on Etsy: a portable bar complete with four aluminum tumblers, two aluminum shot glasses, a bottle opener with hors d’oeuvre knife, a mixing spoon, and a double-sided jigger with handle. (Not like we’re ones to pay much attention to jiggers — it’s a whole lot simpler to eyeball things — but it’s nice to look at.)

And the best part? That spectacular fabric on the interior. It’s like the curtains your Aunt Nell used to have — and we bet it smells faintly of gin, just like she did! Ah, memories.

If New Orleans weren’t so blessed with so many worthy venues, we’d have to snap this up for ourselves. and at $76, the price is totally right.

For The Perfect Martini, Just Use A Pencil

Shaken not stirred

Clearly James Bond didn’t know what he was doing when he ordered his VODKA (horrors) Martini SHAKEN (double horrors) not stirred. For those interested in creating perfection, ask scientists. Speaking of science, I look back now on all the lame, junior high science projects I cranked out at the midnight hour (The Ear; The Benefits of Oat Bran on a Diabetic’s Blood Sugar; Grandma’s Home Remedies) and wonder, why in the hell I didn’t consider analyzing the best way to make a drink? That would have yielded more useful knowledge for my future tippling self. Sigh.

Oh well, if you want to know the secrets, check out the Telegraph.

In Scotland, It’s Burns Night

Tonight, across Scotland, groups of soggy Scots will raise copious glasses to celebrate the birthday of their nation’s poet and champion, Robert Burns. A Burns Night feast includes the requisite Scottish dishes of haggis, neeps and tatties (turnips and potatoes), and ends with cranachan, a fluffy dessert, which Steve Ciccarelli over at Esquire, argues can get you drunk. But based on this typical Burns Night script, it looks you should be good and hammered by the time the cranachan arrives, what with all the toasting to the haggis, the ladies, and to the immortal memory of Burns himself.

I’ve always thought it sad that the United States lacks a holiday full of feasting, toasting and national pride, but removed from overt politics. Thanksgiving really isn’t about America, and if scrutinized too heavily, then we have to own up to our screwing over of the entire Native American population. The Fourth of July seems to only vaguely point at history while we chomp on BBQ and watch fireworks. Even Presidents’ Day is more about selling mattresses and cars and less about old George or Abe. The problem of course is when you organize a holiday around politics or politicians, you end up with dull, safe solemnity.

More Resources For The Vintage Tippler: Happy Hour At 33 RPM

When my future husband and I first shacked up, we kept regular happy hours, almost of of which were accompanied by music from a record player. Perhaps our all-time favorite was 1960s jetsetting beats of Herb Alpert and the Tijiuana Brass. Like a great tippler, the music was polished but it never took itself too seriously. In fact, I’m not sure any other band has ever surpassed the Herb Alpert for sheer drinkability.

Recently Gavin and I realized it had been far too long since we’d had a listen, and so I asked him to revisit his collection to determine which Alpert and Brass album deserved top cocktail billing. His vote: the vinyl vacation Going Places (1965) aptly named for its upbeat, Vegasy renditions of just about every genre known to humans and which spent eighty-four weeks on the top ten pop charts. What a wonderful alternative to the soporific electronica now heard at many upscale bars. Have a listen at Pandora.com.

Getting Drunk

Most of American greets the first of the year as a time to cleanse the body, start that exercise program, or kick out vice. Here in New Orleans, vice is just getting started. Carnival season began January 6 and ends February 21, after which some of us will make the odd gesture of abstention. Till then, it offers as good a reason as any to knock back a few. But if you don’t live in a place where the year is divided into feasting and fasting (ok, mostly feasting), and you’re cold, grumpy and in need of a drink, here are a few reasons for a tipple or two.

Wednesday, January 25: Tales of the Cocktail Preview At The Monteleone

For true cocktail aficionados, there’s no substitute for the festival of booze known as Tales of the Cocktail. It’s one dash literary event, one part mixology demonstration, garnished with a heavy assortment of liquor tastings and other intoxicating affairs. And since it’s held in New Orleans each July — this year, July 25 – 29 — the cool, liquid refreshments are very much appreciated.

Next Wednesday, January 25, from 1:30pm – 4:00pm, Tales of the Cocktail will hold a preview event for its 10th anniversary festival in the bigger, better, super-swanked up bar of the Hotel Monteleone.(Worry not, fellow tipplers: they didn’t touch the Carousel!) Whether you’re a bartender, journalist, of booze-hound, this is an event not to be missed.

In the area? Click here to RSVP.